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Day 1 of Divorced Parenting

Day 1 of divorced-parenting is a turning point.  On your first day of motherhood/fatherhood, you woke up and smiled, realizing that there was an infant now counting on you to take care of her needs and nurture her soul.  Which you did, lovingly.  But on the first morning of separated-parenting you wake up with a stressed look that has long replaced your smile.  “How can I do this?” becomes a very real question.

Stay and linger in bed for a moment.  Put aside the thoughts about your divorce and focus instead on the child that is still sleeping down the hall.  That child, who you lovingly brought into this world, is still counting on you to provide for her and nurture her.  Stay with that thought as long as it takes for you to remember.  To remember that divorce doesn’t change who you are: a parent that loves a child very, very much—demonstrating that love through consistency, security, consideration and so much more.  Divorce doesn’t change that, and your child is counting on you to remember.

Think about love, your child, and your desire to nurture her.  It’s with those grounding thoughts that you can start Day 1 of divorced parenting with a smile.

With this remembrance, you can do it.  You can handle visitation exchanges, communications with your child’s other parent, financial matters, your child’s growing step-family, and all of the many divorced-parenting situations that are now part of your day.  Yes, your parenting situations have changed, but you’re still here to nurture your child’s soul and with that guidance, you’ll not only know what not to do; you’ll know what to do.

The good news? Everyday is a new day filled with the opportunity for you to remember who you are as you parent your child through life and divorce.  Every day is Day 1.

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Mindful thinker and author, Ellen Kellner, guides parents through The Pro-Child Way of nurturing their child’s spirit through her intuition, discernment, and experience.  Her book The Pro-Child Way: Parenting with an Ex is available at Amazon

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Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 02/24/10 at 10:56 AM

When tragedies or hardships befall a family, all members pitch in to see it through.  That is what being in a family is all about.

from Parenting with an Ex

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How are you parenting after divorce?
“I’m actively choosing a new way of thinking. A thinking that listens more to my heart than to the divorced chatter in my mind. When you take time to be still and consider your child, you’ll remember that good parenting skills are absolute and not corrupted by marital status. A child needs love, time, structure, consideration, respect, and discipline. A good parent strives to provide these things and more. I am a parent. A parent who handles divorced parenting situations. And in this mindful world of parenting with an ex, I am choosing the Pro-Child Way. If I can do it, so can you… If I can do it, YOU CAN TOO!” - Ellen